Ann Milgram recently came to a settlement with eHarmony, a website that matches couples based upon research they have done on compatibility between men and women.
A gay man felt discriminated against because eHarmony wouldn't find him a boyfriend.
It mattered not to Milgram that eHarmony has no research on compatibility for homosexual men.
Milgram said eHarmony had to do it, so now they are tasked with determining once and for all if Liza fans and Cher fans really can get along.
Embolden by her self-created state power, Milgram has announced the following new "equality initiatives" she sees as entirley within her control:
- Vegan Restaurants will now serve steak;
- The NFL will play Baseball Games;
- Heart surgeons will conduct brain surgery;
- ACORN will have to register one Republican voter;
- Everyone must use Arianna Huffington's accent so she feels included;
- Joey from Friends will snag an Oscar;
- The Cubs will win a World Series;
- and, under the Fariness Doctrine, The Church will give equal time to Satan.